What if Automakers Were Musicians?

What if Automakers Were Musicians?

Sometimes, when we’re sitting around the AutoGuide.com offices, we come up with answers to questions no ever asked.

Questions like what if automakers were popular musicians? As absurd and useless this endeavour may seem, there are a lot of historic similarities between popular musical artists and automakers. Don’t believe us? Read on! And let us know your own favorite musician and automaker matchups in the comments section below.

Acura1 copyAcura would be Oasis – Great in the 1990s, it appears they’re on the verge of a major comeback in the next year or two.

AstonMartin1 copyAston Martin would be Gwen Stefani – Talented, a bit niche and still sexy after all these years, there’s a certain allure that has created millions of fans the world over.

Audi copyAudi would be Bon Jovi – Still huge and sticking to what made them famous, why mess with a winning formula?

BMW copyBMW would be Dr. Dre – Dabbling in a bit of everything, they continue to turn out successful products and rake in the money.

Buick copyBuick would be Tony Bennett – An all-time favorite of the older generations, lately they’ve found some younger partners to collaborate with in hopes of a new, more youthful fan base.

Cadillac copyCadillac would be Green Day – Who says you can’t make a successful comeback? After some dark years, they came roaring back in the mid-2000s.

Chevrolet copyChevrolet would be KISS – a band that should have been straight out of Detroit, they may have had their up and downs over the years, but not many have achieved as much success throughout their history.

Dodge copyDodge would be Bruce Springsteen – the sound, style and performance still screams “America!” at the top of their lungs.

Ferrari copyFerrari would be Ellie Goulding – Sexy good looks, tons of talent and a sound that is oh so unmistakable.

FCA copyFiat Chrysler Automobiles would be Chickenfoot – A super group that showed so much promise. Things did not go as planned.

Ford copyFord would be Paul McCartney – Helped lead one of the biggest groups in the industry, but since going solo, has found a ton of success as a hit-producing machine.

GM copyGeneral Motors would be the Traveling Wilburys – a group made up of some serious talent that has seen various players come and go over the years.

Honda would be Missy Elliot – After a lot of success, things cooled off for a few years, but 2015 was a promising year and even bigger things are on the horizon.

Hyundai copyHyundai would be Justin Timberlake – A lot of their early stuff was laughable and utter crap, but now they turned into one of the best in the industry.

Infiniti copyInfiniti would be Kanye West – After finding success on their own, they’re leaning on their friends at Mercedes-Benz for a little extra help.

JLR copyJaguar Land Rover would be Dave Grohl – Was once a member of one of the largest groups in the world, due to circumstances beyond their control, they were forced to go solo. But with some new partners, they’re still turning out the hits.

Jeep copyJeep would be Phish – If you get it, you get it. If you don’t, Jeep and its fans don’t care.

Kia copyKia would be Lady Gaga – Seemingly coming out of nowhere, they’ve become a household name and big time player in a very short period of time.

Lamborghini copyLamborghini would be Dave Navarro – A talented, flashy player that keeps getting bounced around from group to group. Looks like it might be time to relocate once again.

Lexus copyLexus would be Michael Bublé – Inoffensive and classy, fans all over the world love them for that certain unmistakable style.

Lotus would be Keith Richards – Seemingly around forever, reports of their demise are premature. They’re indeed still alive and kicking and even producing new products!

Maserati copyMaserati would be Black Sabbath – It’s all about making a loud, magnificent sound, isn’t it?

Mazda copyMazda would be Primus – Most appreciate and respect what they do and consider them very talented. Yet, great commercial success continues to elude them.

McLaren copyMcLaren Automotive would be Adele – A relative British newcomer on the scene, so far, it’s been an impressive run with hit after hit.

Mercedes-Benz copyMercedes-Benz would be Jay-Z – Successful at pretty much whatever they do, they’ve been in the game a long time and show no signs of stopping soon. They have a close relationship with Nissan and Infiniti.

MINI copyMINI would be the Jackson 5 – Just because they aren’t full size doesn’t mean they aren’t any good.

Mitsubishi copy copyMitsubishi would be Guns and Roses – With its best days occurring in the ’80s and ’90s, we’re all waiting for the much-anticipated comeback that is scheduled to happen in the next year or so.

Nissan copyNissan would be Beyoncé – Widely popular the world over, things are getting a bit too familiar, but we’re sure there will be another big hit soon.

Porsche copyPorsche would be the Rolling Stones – One of the greatest of all time, they had to go a little more mainstream to continue doing what they love – getting out there and performing in front of a crowd.

RollsRoyce copyRolls-Royce would be Plácido Domingo – It’s all about classic style, luxury and performance. Gaining entry to the show is just going to cost you a lot of money.

Scion copyScion would be Brit Floyd – The industry’s best cover band proves that if you just close your eyes and take it all in, it feels just like the real thing.

smart copySmart would be that guy playing solo at your local bar – A heavily city-based product, there’s still something alluring to this simple, small production.

Subaru would be Arcade Fire – Were a small, quirky manufacturer with a devoted following, but have gone more mainstream lately. Loved in Canada.

Tesla copyTesla would be the Sex Pistols – Not conforming to society’s ideals and the status quo, this brand goes by the beat of its own drum. But they will gladly take your money.

Toyota copyToyota would be Taylor Swift – Although there’s a fair share of haters, they know how to make products the general public loves and are laughing all the way to the bank.

VW copyVolkswagen would be the Monkees – Caught faking it, it’s now up to them to prove they can actually perform like we were led to believe. Will their next product be the equivalent of Head?

Volvo copyVolvo would be Men Without Hats – We can dance, We can dance, Everybody’s taking the cha-nce, It’s a safety dance!

  • smartacus

    Ram (when it was a brand) would be Dave Dudley because Six Days On The Road

    Hummer would be Big Pun because they can’t be brought back
    Pontiac would be The Trashmen because they had fun, but that was a looong time ago
    Geo would be Chumbawumba because oh yeah i remember them
    Suzuki would be Hootie and The Blowfish because fans still say maaaybe they”ll comeback
    Edsel would be Moby :p
    Mercury would be Nelly Furtado because nobody noticed the absence and nobody cared

  • rd

    Ram still is a brand.

  • http://dbcooper.livejournal.com Perry F. Bruns

    The Mercury:Nelly Furtado analogy is particularly apt because each was just like other stuff from the same label.

  • MC78

    Love this feature.
    Detroit will soon be coming with torches and pitchforks though…
    KISS is from Jersey though (I know, the song, we love the homage, but Jersey)

  • Mike Schlee

    Oops. My mistake. I’ll fix it.

  • Jonny_Vancouver

    Awesome list! <3 Taylor Swift, lol

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