Automakers give a ton of attention to cupholders in cars, but what about places to put our tissue boxes?
Really, tissues are far more important than your morning coffee. You can probably use one every trip you take in your car. Maybe you thought of your recently deceased cat, or that rainbow off in the distance is triggering your tear ducts, or perhaps the motorists on the road are so courteous that you can’t help but cry. More realistically, tissues are great for getting your hands clean after devouring a whole burrito while driving, or for blowing your nose, since you declined to clean your car’s cabin air filter and it’s now blowing dust and other garbage through the car.
Whatever the reason is, tissues are as important as anything else in your car, but we never seem to have the ideal place to put them. Some people stash them on the shelf behind the rear seats, but that’s practically impossible to reach. Others put them on the floor, but then the box gets all crushed up and no one likes using a tissue from a crunched up box.
Here’s a list of places you should consider putting your tissues instead:
Your glovebox has to be the most inappropriately named component of your vehicle’s interior. First of all, a glove box should include gloves. It should be overflowing with gloves if it’s called a glove box! Also, what are people really putting in there? Their owners manual probably, a big fat bible full of unnecessary information like how much blinker fluid is needed every 3,000 miles. Instead, if your glovebox is big enough, you can put a tissue box in it. That way it can be easily reachable, yet secretly hidden, so your car won’t look like a huge mess.
The armrest is a doozy. If your car even has one, it’s likely not big enough to hold a standard-sized tissue box, meaning you’d have to go to exotic, obscure tissue box customizing services like promotissue.eu to get something done right. But if you own a huge gas-guzzling SUV, like say the GMC Tahoe, or a big SUV and need something to wipe away your freedom-induced tears, a tissue box would easily fit in those arm rests.
On Top of the Dashboard
This location is mostly accessible by those in the front two seats, which makes it ideal for coupe drivers. Not only that, but the dash acts like a lateral lazy susan, so you can deliver the tissues to your passenger with a quick lane change. Of course, this whole method can go awry if you drive a convertible.
As proven by kindergarten toys, it really is possible to jam a square peg into a circular hole. Just put that cube-style box in the cup holder. Everything will work out fine.
Don’t be crazy, of course we’re not suggesting you strap a box of tissues to your sun visor. Instead, dust off all your old sun visor CD holders, and put tissues in place of the CDs! That’s smart recycling right there! Or if you’re really lazy, you can just buy one of these items from Amazon, eBay or AliExpress.
Under the Hood
Sometimes owners of cars with awesome engines, like the Dodge Charger or Challenger Hellcat, will get so overwhelmed with emotion about their rides that they start to tear up. Often times, those owners will even pop open their hood just to pay tribute to the awesome 707-hp motor. This is where a tissue box would be handy. Also, sometimes V6 Mustang owners start to cry when they look at their engines, but for different reasons. A well-placed box of tissues placed delicately on your car’s engine cover will be really handy. Or duct tape it to anything you find in there.
Pickup Truck Bed
Pickup truck owners are always getting their hands dirty, or spending time in the great outdoors where allergies or other messes get can get them. Or they’re not doing anything like that, and just attending tailgate parties. Whatever the case, putting a box of tissues in the bed of a truck will be a real convenience, but do understand that only jumbo-sized tissue boxes should be put in a pickup bed to maximize the space’s utility.
It’s not like you’re using the roof rack for anything else, are you?
Happy April Fool’s Day from your friends at AutoGuide.com 🙂