Five-Point Inspection: 2013 Mercedes-Benz G63 AMG

This week’s Five-Point Inspection is all about opulent luxury, speed, and a go anywhere attitude encompassed in the Mercedes-Benz G63 AMG.

The AMG designation on the already pricey G550 tacks and extra $20,000 to the price tag, totaling at a whopping $134,300. It runs with a 5.5-liter bi-turbo V8 that puts out 544 hp and 560 lb-ft of torque.

Read on for our five main likes and dislikes of the Mercedes G63.

Despite its massive amount of power, throwing the G63 into a corner inspires anything but confidence. The AMG badge represents a sports car image than the G63 simply can’t live up to with its 30 year old truck chassis design.

It is tall, susceptible to cross winds, and feels as though it might go tumbling into the ditch when you rip the wheel left or right.

Shoehorning that massive bi-turbo V8 with 544 hp and 560 lb-ft under the hood is definitely more for the city-bound poser, than the track-bound racer. Face it: the number one reason to buy a G63 isn’t performance (of the on- or off-road sort), it’s status.

Generation to generation, many vehicles carry over a few hints from the previous model cycle. For instance, the round taillights on the back of Corvette haven’t changed for years, but the rest of the car is unrecognizable.

The G, however, looks nearly identical to when it first hit the market in 1979, a testament to Mercedes-Benz engineering, and proud heritage. The only other military vehicle that has attempted to match the G was the Hummer, and it eventually went soft too, and then died.

Even the Nissan Pathfinder turned into a mommy-ready crossover. Where the competition has faltered, the G-Class is still the Stalone of SUVs; big, bold and bad ass. It is unapologetic in a world that demands sleek design and fuel efficiency, and for that it deserves kudos.

The gas pedal on the G-Class takes some getting used too. It sits flat, offers very little back pressure, and has limited travel from nothing to full throttle.

Off-road, it’s easy to be gentle with the throttle, which is beneficial when crawling over obstacles. The uncompromising nature of the G-Class again plays against it on road, however, as the limited travel of the pedal means you must be feather light with it, or else it will be on the floor before you can say “sauerkraut.”

AMG’s signature growling beast exhaust note is not absent on the G, and suits its lightning-quick nature. Jamming the pedal to the floor emits a roar akin to an angry bear, and the acceleration that follows feels closer to a Shelby GT500 than a military truck as it reaches 60 mph in 5.3 seconds.

Fuel mileage suffers greatly, with an already unattainable 12 mpg in the city and 14 mpg on the highway, but the of fun had by hurtling this big brick down the road at break-neck speeds is worth it, helping you to forget the large investment you are putting into the gas tank. Straight line power is where the G63 lives.

A complete makeover was given to the interior of the G63 this year, outfitting it with leather surfaces, velour carpets, and elegance that you would never want to get muddy. Off-roading means that it is inevitable that you will get dirty, and bringing that dirt into the pristine Mercedes cabin will feel like throwing a cup of black coffee on your bride’s wedding dress. You wouldn’t want to scrape one of those shiny and massive 20-inch wheels by taking it off road either.

Futhermore, if you can accept that the dirt is going to get everywhere, cleaning the inside of the G63 will be a challenge; velour certainly can’t be hosed down.