Jeremy Clarkson Names His Top 10 Terrible Cars

Jason Siu
by Jason Siu

After revealing his Top 10 Star Cars, Jeremy Clarkson has now done the opposite.

The former host of Top Gear has listed his stinkers, cars that he just absolutely did not enjoy driving in the last year or so. Many of the cars on his terrible 10 list aren’t even sold in North America, but there were a few that caught our attention.

SEE ALSO: Jeremy Clarkson Reveals His Top 10 Star Cars

Vauxhall Astra SRi NAV

The Vauxhall Astra isn’t sold in North America, but it’s particularly interesting because the British automaker is owned by General Motors. Despite having a 1.6-liter turbocharged four-cylinder engine with 197 horsepower, Clarkson didn’t have much to say about the Astra: “I still had to cobble together some thoughts on the Vauxhall, though. It was red and turbocharged and it would be fine for anyone who needed four wheels and a place to sit down when moving out. And now I’m out of space, which is probably a good thing, because I have nothing else to say about it.”

Infiniti Q30 Premium Tech

Known as the Infiniti QX30 in the U.S., the compact crossover didn’t leave a good impression with Clarkson. He did say the 2.2-liter turbocharged diesel engine with 168 hp moved the car along and seemed fuel efficient enough, but it sounded “like a canal boat when it’s cold.” But Clarkson ended up giving the Q30 two stars because the powerplant just didn’t have enough power, and we all know how much the eccentric host loves power.

BMW X1 xDrive25d

Another diesel model on the list, Clarkson had very few nice things to say about the BMW X1 xDrive25d. He criticized the original X1 model for feeling like a cement mixer and it doesn’t seem like the new-generation model pleases him either. “I suppose that, all things considered, it’s not a bad car. It doesn’t crash all the time, or explode,” he noted. “If it were a Kia or a car from one of those weird Chinese companies, you’d say it was quite nice.”

But the problem is, it’s a BMW and Clarkson holds the company to a higher standard.

Volkswagen Scirocco 2.0 TDI

For all those wishing the Volkswagen Scirocco was sold in the U.S., maybe you shouldn’t. At least, not with a 2.0-liter TDI engine. In the most Clarkson way possible, the critic explained that he didn’t even want to drive the new Scirocco. “You know how it goes. You enjoyed a year-long relationship 35 years ago. You hook up again, thanks to Facebook. And she has turned into a moose,” referring to a random old flame. “Nobody wants that in their lives. Better to keep love from the past as a memory.”

Nissan GT-R Track Edition

But the most surprising car on the list has to be the Nissan GT-R Track Edition. Clarkson absolutely raves about the standard GT-R model, calling it a five-star car. But the Track Edition is an entirely different story. “There is no give. At all. Drive over a manhole cover and you get some idea of what it might be like to be involved in a plane crash,” he says. “You actually feel the top of your spine bouncing off the inside of your skull.”

Sadly, Clarkson gave the Nissan GT-R Track Edition no stars at all, saying that it’s pretty much useless.

Other cars that were named on the list include: Skoda Superb SE L Executive, Zenos E10 S, Renault Kadjar dCi 130 Signature Nav, Seat Leon X-Perience SE Technology and Hyundai i800.

[Source: The Sunday Times]

Discuss this story on our Nissan GT-R Forum

Jason Siu
Jason Siu

Jason Siu began his career in automotive journalism in 2003 with Modified Magazine, a property previously held by VerticalScope. As the West Coast Editor, he played a pivotal role while also extending his expertise to Modified Luxury & Exotics and Modified Mustangs. Beyond his editorial work, Jason authored two notable Cartech books. His tenure at saw him immersed in the daily news cycle, yet his passion for hands-on evaluation led him to focus on testing and product reviews, offering well-rounded recommendations to AutoGuide readers. Currently, as the Content Director for VerticalScope, Jason spearheads the content strategy for an array of online publications, a role that has him at the helm of ensuring quality and consistency across the board.

More by Jason Siu

Join the conversation
2 of 10 comments